Does it matter to you if your boyfriend doesn't like to drive?

Question

This was inspired from a question below listing off "rules" that girls should know about guys. They claimed that girls should let the guy drive because that is what guys like to do.

I realize this is also a pretty common thing in our society. Typically men like driving and take pride in their cars.

For whatever reason I have always hated driving though. It's not that I want to be driven around everywhere I will walk or take the bus or whatever to where I need to go, but I just don't like driving unless it is necessary. I get anxious when driving and feel like I'm just going to get into an accident and it's hard for me to relax in that situation.

So mostly this question is directed at girls: would you care if your boyfriend didn't like to drive? This is a situation where he COULD drive but he'd just prefer you drive. Would that bother you?

Updates

+1 y

Wow I didn't expect this to be that much of an answer grabber. Kind of fun to come home and see 50 notifications LOL

So something I thought was clear that I guess wasn't from the question is that I'm not talking about someone who CAN'T drive. Obviously in that situation you want him to learn how to drive.

I'm just saying that in a situation where you're going somewhere together does it matter if he would prefer you driving.

So far the consensus seems to be that there is no consensus :D

Gawesome · Accepted Answer

I love cars and driving...but like any big city...I hate driving in my city of Vancouver! A good chunk of drivers are idiots/crazy/rage issues, traffic is a nightmare, and owning a car is expensive. Did I mention this city is crazy expensive to live in? We have a great public transit system so it doesn't bother me. I live in a good area where everything is close to me (groceries, shopping, restaurants, parks, etc) I'm single and in my 20s so as long as I can get frm point A to B either transit, bike, walk...it's all goooood! (besides...there's TONS of pretty girls on the bus :D)

It does bother me a bit as a man sometimes but I try not to let it get to me. It's a great city to live and in and I rather save and buy a 700k townhome first than live in my fancy car :P We're no different than NYC...who drives or own a car when you have an awesome subway system that connects you everywhere? In a way it what makes you a new yorker or vancouverite.

But I'll definitely get a car when I'm in a serious relationship and/or have kids on the way.

kheserthorpe · Accepted Answer

Its going to depend where you live. Most people I knew living downtown (when I did) didn't own cars. There was no point. They walked/cabbed everywhere.

I'd sold a condo, was buying a house, was married and had a child before I got a car.

But if you live in the suburbs, you need a car if you can afford it.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Yes and no, With my ex boyfriend he was 21 and I was 19 and he was still learning to drive ( he was an iddiot) But yea at fist it was OK I didn't mind driving to his house all the time or diving us around places and he did put gas in my car but honestly after a while ii was so sick of it! Its kinda a turn off and my family would be like wtf why doesn't he pick you up! and kinda make fun of me for driving my boyfriend around

After him I would never go out with a guy without a car, shietttt better come pick my ass up you wanna get sum lol

yea so learrn how to drive!

hot_princess7 · Accepted Answer

Having a car and drivers license is kind of essential to his "I've got my sh*t together" look.

So he'd better have a good reason not to have one.

I question how exciting this guy is - does he never travel? Buy groceries? Go hiking? How does he do it all?

I'm not a taxi service.

I think if you drove more often you would get over your nervousness, like I did.

So yes, in conclusion, this does matter. Kind of like how he shouldn't live with his parents or be unemployed or not understand what birth control is.

DebiPie · Accepted Answer

Wouldn't bother me a bit because I love to drive and I really don't feel comfortable letting others drive. I have always felt this way. So I am always the driver. In my life, I have only felt safe & comfortable with 3 people's driving skills, and I really haven't ridden with too many other people, maybe a handful. Those 3 are my dad (not anymore, he doesn't drive now), my best girlfriend & my ex-husband (when he was sober, lol).

Plus, I get terribly car sick unless I'm driving. Very unattractive. lol... gross too.

aft18 · Answer

The guy I've been talking to doesn't have a car since his last one broke down so he will probably be getting a new one in a little while. This may take time though because we're still young adults and don't have the money to pay for things like a new car, until we save up enough. Therefore, I typically pick him up and drive to wherever we go and I don't mind. The only time I would mind is if he started asking me to bring him somewhere if we weren't even planning on seeing each other. So basically if a guy started using me for rides is when I would mind, other than that, I don't care if I drive or if he drove.

Ranta · Answer

I'd rather that my boyfriend had his licence (though not having one wouldn't be a deal-breaker!). That being said, to answer your question, it wouldn't bother me at all if he preffered to avoid taking the wheel. I actually love driving, so I'd be more than fine with getting the chance to do it more often! :P

The only time it would bother me would be if he then started criticizing my driving (/backseat driving), or if he refused to run the occasional errand (e.g. not wanting to make a quick trip to the store if I was really busy with something else. That being said, if he wanted to bus/bike/walk to the store instead of driving, that would be totally fine by me).

I hope this helps! :)

Frostie · Answer

Idk, I can't drive, and the concept of driving annoys me. Mostly because I can't stand the people who drive like crazy where I live.. most don't yield for patrons who have right of way by walking light, or other wise.. they're aggressive, will tailgate you till you get off the road, or worse. People here seem very 'boastful' but lacking humility. So the girls in my area won't even consider you if you can't drive, if you drive, it better be a muscle or sports car. Most the kids in the hs around my area are spoiled like hell. I've seen this one kid who had a lotus the other day, and even a mustang that his father was going to give him. oh and everyone seems to love sleeping pills like crazy here.

Yeah, I'm not a girl, but I felt like giving a painted picture of what its like in Texas.

Darkfairie17 · Answer

My boyfriend doesn't like to drive either. But he does a lot of driving, for both work and for his family.

It's not a deal breaker for me, it doesn't matter to me if a guy drives or not. I know many people who have anxiety issues related to driving and it makes perfect sense to me that they do not drive unless they have to. That is why there are other methods of transportation such as walking, biking, and buses.

In my relationship I try to do the driving once in a while, my boyfriend lets me use his car and I will drive him places. The past two years, I have been in school and I don't own my own car yet. But I have my full license and can drive, just didn't have a vehicle.

When I would go back to my parents house, I would use their cars and come visit my boyfriend. Now that I am done school, I might buy a car.

Cars are expensive and for some people driving is really stressful. I would rather be the one driving if I was most comfortable behind the wheel.

EPhantom · Answer

I do not like driving for many reasons. One is that I live in a university town, so the drivers and trafic are insane, and secondly most of the time my passengers SCREAM (literally) if I hit the breaks with 1/4th the power that they would. It's too stressful for me.

Also there is the cost of gas, enjoying walking every so often, living near the local grocery store so I can just go get what I want and walk back home whenever. and if you use your own vehicle you're going to have to pay for anti-freeze, oil, tires, and all the other maintenance issues. bleh

DaniJ · Answer

Judging by the different answers here, I'd say that there isn't really a right or wrong answer.  Some people want the guy to drive all the time, some never want the guy to drive, so I guess it depends on the specific girl that you want to know about.  Just remember, that if you are anxious while you drive, it probably makes you a safer driver than someone who isn't concerned at all.  Just focus on the rules and work on anticipating the moves of other drivers, and eventually you'll start to relax some.

misuzi · Answer

As a guy I'll say I don't like driving all the time and that at times I enjoy being the passenger. However, I find that it's typically better for me to be driving for 2 reasons. 1) Many girls are bad drivers and 2) Many girls have a bad sense of direction

That is enough to usually make me take up the driving responsibilities

december1990 · Answer

No offense but me driving a man around everywhere, makes him seem kinda less manly LOL unless I'm married to him.. I'd rather him be the man and drive me around... I think it's kinda weird if I'm dating a guy without a license it makes me seem older and like I have all the responsibility and it makes me seem like I have the pants in the relationship and I don't really like that it's kinda retarded <.< lol

Stacyzee · Answer

I would rather a guy drive because there comes a point in life where you must depend on yourself. Also, if this guy were the father of my child it'd be easier for him to accomplish everyday tasks if he had a steady means of transportation. Driving = convenience.

If he got anxious has you say while driving, I'd rather him be safe than sorry and I'd take over.

I'd never pressure him to do anything, he felt was a threat to his life.

blufrenzy93 · Answer

It would only bother me if I did all the driving. When I first started to drive, none of the guys I dated had their license and/or didn't have a car. So I was always the one driving, which got really annoying after a while. Now that I'm older, I expect a guy to at least be able to drive and take turns being the driver.

grapefruitms · Answer

My last boyfriend didn't drive. It didn't bother me but people told me it should. I guess we are still a very traditional society. But really, if you don't like to drive it's your perogative and there are other things you can do to get where you're going, as you know. I don't enjoy driving either. Hey maybe you should try a therapist who can help you get over your fear of it?

And maybe you should find a girl who loves driving :).

whatlove2212 · Answer

That wouldn't bother me in the least. Especially if the guy paid for dinners, because essentially I would be paying for gas. Who cares? I used to not like driving, but then I got good at it, and now I prefer being the one behind the wheel (I've been driving nearly every day for 11 years).

windy-rose · Answer

I'd rather drive. Partly because I've gotten to always being the driver for whatever group of people I'm in, and partly because I have a wicked sense of direction.

I get rather antsy as a passenger (unless I'm super tired), I like having something to focus on, and it ensures I don't get car sick...

xTeacup · Answer

My English class was actually talking about this the other day.

About how it used to be traditional for men to drive.

No, I honestly don't care if a guy doesn't like to drive.

To be honest, I don't either. I prefer walking to places if possible. Or bike riding. But obviously that's not always an option. But I'd drive if my S.O. didn't want to.

Not a big deal at all.

kdizzleforizzle91 · Answer

I don't like driving, either. I actually take the bus to school. But part of that is because my family and I can't afford the amount of gas it would take every month. I can ride the bus for free with my student ID, it comes right behind my house, and it's always on time.

That being said, I'd drive if I had to, but I'd like if my boyfriend, or whoever I was with, was the one driving. I've barely driven at all since I got my license. haha

rudy37lee · Answer

This would bother me a bit, yes.  It would just make things more difficult and I wouldn't want to have to plan stuff around the fact that you are scared to drive.  I love the freedom of having my license and my own car, but my fiance' always drives when we're together and I love it.  Even in my car, he always drives.  Do you at least own a car for when you need one?  I would not want to date someone who didn't own a car or have plans to get one in the near future.

aMuse · Answer

I like to drive, but don't want to be treated like a girl's chauffeur... She should be able to manage to go places on her own without wanting me to always come along and drive her... On long road trips it's nice to be able to depend on someone to do part of the driving so you can relax for a little bit. Other then that I don't mind I suppose...

samhradh_leannan · Answer

Since I don't drive (yet), it's convenient that my boyfriend loves driving. It's definitely not a bad thing if you like driving. But it's not a big deal either way. It's not something that will be a deal breaker for me. Especially since I don't even drive myself!

Anonymous · Answer

I'm a walking compass, so I love to drive because when you're like me, being in the passenger seat is really aggravating because you just sit there the entire time thinking "We really should have made a left here..." :P

Anonymous · Answer

depends on where I am. I don't drive. I've been living in nyc for a few years now so it doesn't matter but I'm going back to the md/dc area for a little bit soon and driving may be more important there than here. so if he doesn't drive and I don't drive and we are in md, we may not see each other. if its dc, then we can just take the metro. he take the public transit in baltimore if he wants, but I don't and I never have so that's his call. it sucks.

Does it matter to you if your boyfriend doesn't like to drive?

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