Why won't my boyfriend take me to his friends wedding?

[Anonymous]

Hi,

For the past two months my boyfriend has been talking about his friends upcoming wedding. Now it will be in just two weeks and since he still hadn't asked me to go I asked him if he wanted me to go with him. I saw the invite and it's him plus one. We live together and are in a long term relationship. I've met his friend several times and we get along fine.

He got defensive and said he hadn't given it much thought. Then he said no he doesn't want me to go because he didn't 'plan on it' . What the hell does that mean? The wedding is here in town so what is there to plan? Am I right to be upset and think it's really weird that he doesn't want me to go? What should I do?

Why won't my boyfriend take me to his friends wedding?

Updates

+1 y

To anyone who was wondering why he doesn't want to take me: He said it's because I don't drink and I'm not a good dancer.
I like to dance, i'm not horrible but i'm also not the best. He's really into dancing (salsa and bachata ect) He said he just wants to have fun and he doesn't think he will if I go.
This pisses me off. He could still bring me and dance with other people if he wants I don't care and I never give him a hard time for drinking, it doesn't bother me. Sounds like a half truth

Updates

+1 y

Hey all,
The truth as to why he didn't want to take me was because he wanted to take someone else. He didn't even have a particular girl in mind he just wanted to take someone else. The dumbass asked a girl who's friends of a friend of mine. He met her when he went out one night (about a week before the wedding) and told her was single and they started talking. He took her out to dinner a few days later and then invited her to the wedding with him.

[Cynicaldreamer]

Ouch. Either he's not that serious about you like you thought he was, or there's another girl he wants to take, or plans to see there and doesn't want her to see or know about you.

Either way, now you what he thinks about you and your relationship... what do you plan to do about it?

[Asker]

Seriously thinking about ending this if he can't even give me a valid reason why he doesn't want me to go. The fact that he got defensive and angry when I confronted him makes it even worse. Whats the point of being in a serious longterm relationship if you're not comfortable bringing your partner to be your 'plus one' to events like this?

[Grobmate]

End it. You are worth more than putting up with that shit. If they treat you like an option, leave them like a choice.

[Tututwerl09]

There has to be another girl there or he doesn't wnat you to get all mushy on the wedding stuff

[Grobmate]

Either another girl or... she will discover things that he may have said that he wants hidden. The frie ds wanted her there, otherwise it would not have had plus 1 on the invitation. Either way, don't need to play detective to figure out he's an untrustworthy slime ball.

[Metatarsals]

It's weird that he won't. Do you get along with his friends? If you don't and had situations in the past where there was a lot of drama then maybe they asked him not to bring you.

[Asker]

No drama between me and any of his friends. But there is one thing. The bride really wanted my boyfriend to date her best friend a few months before he and I started dating. He didn't like her friend though so nothing ever came of that...

[No_Archons]

Bad sign no doubt about it, or maybe his friend doesn't like u? Would he be embarassed by u in any way?

[Asker]

No his friend and I get along fine. Haha I don't know if he's embarrassed by me but now it kind of feels like it.

[No_Archons]

Is there any reason he would b? U fat or rude?

[Asker]

Haha. Nope not fat or rude or weird. The only thing that might be different or stand out about me is that I don't drink alcohol...

[No_Archons]

Hmmm that cud b why if he wants to get shitfaced

[sasukeuchiha7]

Three reasons from where I see
1. He wants to spend the day with his friends.
2. His friend told him not to bring you and he's not telling you so that you don't feel bad.
3. He's meeting some other girl.

[sasukeuchiha7]

After that update, maybe the fact he's a great dancer and you're bad one makes him feel he'll look bad there.

[lewisbzxxx]

I would also question why, my first though would be that he isn’t sure about introducing you to his friends yet, but since you have met them and as you say get a long well with them, it does seem strange. There may be someone attending the wedding who he doesn’t want you to meet or doesn’t want to know about you. That’s my thinking.

[JohnAlaska43]

Think he's taking a girl to friends wedding. He doesn't want to take you period. Id ask him why? I think its a red flag. Id find out why.

[Secret6620]

Maybe he is going to take someone else. Or maybe he isn't ready for you to come to such an event. 😢😫

[luvstoned4him]

well either there is a girl there who is coming that he doesn't want you to know about or he doesn't want you to start hegging him to get married.

[luvstoned4him]

@Asker smells player to me. I would dump him

[Grobmate]

Damn straight you do hun. What an arsehole. Alarm bells are ringing there!

I know what it feels like, (ex did same thing to me).

[aquíestoy]

I think there are 2 variants : there will be someone whom he doesn’t want you to meet.
He is ashamed of you (my friend’s boyfriend was like that)

[Giggletr0n]

Sounds like he doesn't want you to assume that just because there is a wedding going on that you two will end up marrying

[Asker]

I don't know why guys fear that just because they bring their girlfriend as a guest to a wedding she's going to start hounding him about getting married.

[Giggletr0n]

An unfortunate stereotype that we have built up from several shared instances of this exact thing happening

[evcnewl]

Because he is jealous and wants you to stay away from other guys

[Dav1ss]

Maybe he doesn't have a guest or is going with his mom

[Dav1ss]

Ditch him the jerk can't say that to you

[codycccccccccc]

He just wants to get drunk and stupid without you around to bug him

[Valnac]

Hell yeah, there’s something wrong. The fact that you live together and are in a long term relationship. You just don’t do that.

[skeetskeetskeet]

It means. There's going to be a girl there that he wants to fuck and can't have you screw it up

[bkbk21]

Definitely another girl. He just wants spend time with her without you being around

[Lilykittycutie]

Cause he is a jerk. Ask him why ı really wanna learn that too

[Liam_Hayden]

He doesn't want you to get any ideas.

[MlleCake]

Yeah, kinda weird.

[AwesomeLadaaay]

Go get drunk