Has anyone here been in or is currently in, an Asexual relationship? Was and it is there, physical affection?

[VIVANT]

I’m asking out of curiosity. I know in general such relationship sexual where Asexual people do have lots of affection.. I just wonder if anyone here has had such a relationship.

Picture has nothing to do with question.. I just saw him in a car when mailing a package.. He looks like a Minnie Me of my neighbor (many of you have seen Thatcher) I think he is adorable 🤷‍♀️😊

I have been in and or am currently in, an Asexual relationship. We enjoyed all kinds of physical contact. Including kissing. Even some light sexual activity. Just not sex.

I have been in and or am currently in, an Asexual relationship. We enjoyed cuddling and kissing. Nothing sexual.

I have been in and or am currently in, an Asexual relationship. We enjoyed cuddling. No kissing. No sex.

I have been in and or am currently in, an Asexual relationship. We would hug. Hold hands. Sit close. Nothing more.

I have been in and or am currently in, an Asexual elationship. Neither of us really liked touching at all.

Other.

[razelove]

I have a roommate who's female, we don't have sex, though we're attracted to each other. We enjoy the dynamic we have, we'll hug, lightly cuddle, at least closer than I do with friends that are guys, and watch movies or TV every now and then.

That would count as an asexual relationship as we don't have sex, or plan to at all. We have sex with other people, our goal is just to help each other out financially, sometimes emotionally, and feel comfortable. It works, I like the time we spend together, but it would be more awkward if we were having sex.

[Aethereal]

I'm curious about the answers to this as well. I know some asexual people never want sex but will be affectionate in other ways (hugging, kissing, cuddling, etc.). But there are also some who don't want physical intimacy at all.

I personally would date an asexual person (but never have). Even though I see sex as a strong form of physical intimacy, I can do without it. I would need the other forms of physical intimacy though. I could never be with someone who didn't like hugs, kisses, or cuddling.

[VIVANT]

Me too. I’d be willing g to try with a very affectionate person. Affectionate Asexyal I’d try

Asexual -or sexual - Aaffectionate.. no thanks. 👎

[SydneySentinel]

I've never been in one and I don't think it would work for me. I need physical intimacy.

[VIVANT]

You mean sexual intimacy or just physical?

[SydneySentinel]

Sexual intimacy and physical affection

[SteveSmith1985]

Great question! I have no information whatsoever to give... but I am very interested to see the replies.

[VIVANT]

Me too I’m curious to hear if anyone has had that experience 😊

[serious]

I am not sure if an asexual can actually be in an exclusive and long lasting romantic relationship with the opposite gender unless of course both the people involved are completely asexual, chances of which are very slim.

Yes, about me. I am asexual, and no I have always been single and I wish to remain single for life.

[VIVANT]

Well yes it would make sense for both to be asexual.. I’m not sure why you think this is so unlikely?

[VIVANT]

Do you also not like touch? Or just sex?

How did you discover or decide you are Asexual? Was it a choice or just how you are?

[serious]

@VIVANT

"Well yes it would make sense for both to be asexual"

Of course because only then there will be a compatibility as far as their core thinking as asexuals are concerned. There will never be any problems while showing their love, the way they want too. Since both would find sex and sexual activities as disgusting, hence they will only give importance to love, romantic love and won't have any expectations from their partner to only show them love in a particular way.

Hence if both the partners are asexual and if there is high compatibility in other areas as well, then a break up happening would be highly unlikely. They both can have a really long lasting exclusive relationship where there will only be love and nothing more.

[serious]

@VIVANT

" I’m not sure why you think this is so unlikely?"

Well, there are reasons for that as well. I will tell you. Just ask yourself, how many people in this world are asexuals? If you trust google, then it says only 1% of this world total population is asexual. Lets say there is some error and you can keep it as a max of 5%. Then also only 5% of this world's population is asexual and so what are the chances that two people in a relationship would be completely asexuals?

Even if you try to predict or make an estimate you will know that chances are extremely slim but they are not zero. Hence highly unlikely.

Another point is an asexual will show their love in a totally different way as compared to a person with normal sexual desires. Hence showing their love by the means of sex and sexual activities are completely ruled out and that includes lip-lock or french kiss as well because they will see it as unhygienic/unclean. Hence that will never happen.

Just imagine a man is completely asexual but the woman has normal levels of sexual desire. Then how long do you think she will stay in that relationship out of her will?

The way an asexual man would show his love on a woman would be limited to as follows:

1. Hand kiss.

2. Kisses on palms.

3. Forehead kiss.

4. Kisses on eyes.

5. Kisses on top of head ( Skull)

6. Kisses on back of head ( back portion of skull area) and holding it softly etc.

7. Hugs from either front or behind but their hand position will never be in a sexual area, like they will touch the head, the eyes or the back portion of their partners head ( skull).

How long do you think a woman who has normal sexual desires will be fine with an asexual man who will forever only show this kind of love?

I think you know the answer yourself.

[serious]

@VIVANT

"Do you also not like touch? Or just sex?"

Honestly I totally dislike both. I don't want to and don't like to be touched except if it is like shaking hands while meeting the person or for if there is a meeting ( professionally speaking).

Sex? I know what that is, I have good amount of knowledge on sex and sexual acts but I absolutely find them outright disgusting. I find it cheap, exploitative, unclean, unhygienic. The very thought of these things can't ever come in my head. I am immune to these thoughts.

Yes, I can only have thoughts related to love/romance etc and nothing more than that.

I don't care what the research says about sex and sexual activities, I don't care if the world glorifies sex or sexual activities. I only care what I think, I only give importance to my thinking because it is my life.

[serious]

@VIVANT

"How did you discover or decide you are Asexual? Was it a choice or just how you are?"

Well, I realized it a long long time ago. The time when I was still a teenager. No, asexuality is not a decision. It is not a choice. A person is either " ASEXUAL" or they are not. It is not something a person can choose between.

Yes there is another term called as " CELIBACY", that is a choice. I am sure you know what celibacy is? right?

[serious]

@VIVANT

If you wish to converse more on this or have more questions to ask me then please feel free to message me anytime and ask me there or continue the conversation there.

Just an offer.

[VIVANT]

Hi 🤷‍♀️

Firs of all, I’m sorry I fired off Questions like that.. it was late I was really tired. normally I Would ask permission first a it is personal. I’m glad you did not take offense. I Meant no harm.

Thank you for answering so I’m depth. ☺️

[VIVANT]

I’d love to take you up on your offer. Thank you!

Just to say..

1. as far as 1% of the population being Asexual... that is actually the same as or close to the worlds Jewish (and incidentally hermaphroditic) population.. so quite a bit of people and enough for them to find others with similar preferences.. it would require some looking but there are sites for that 😊

2. I do think if both are not Asexual that would be too much stress , though I have seen some people say they are willing to do it to please their partner, but I think that’s a really bad set up and likely will lead to a lot of resentment on each side.. but hey I suppose it depends on the person.

3 I can understand being revolted by the idea and I don’t think you have anything to prove. People get uncomfortable with the idea that some are simply not Driven by sex, but it is true and does not Mean you don’t understand yourself. I respect what you say about yourself.

5. I actually have read there are varying degrees of what people who consider themselves Asexual, are comfortable doing. Some won’t touch at all... some are ok with physical intimacy but not including sex.

6. I read as well there are different reasons for identifying as Asexual. For ex. You can be disgusted or simply not interested it simply choosing to go without. Etc.. I suppose depending on the reason it would affect each rejstionship differently.

[COMMODOREII]

I have always been in a sexual relationship and i am usually passionate about the women i am friends with and in love with. So i express how i feel and never keep myself from my friends. A friend has a right to always talk to me, and be affectionate with me. I will never embarrass her nor make her feel unwanted in any way.

[VIVANT]

Hmm I’m not sure what you are saying

I mean I understand it.. but how does it apply to Asexuwl relationships?

[COMMODOREII]

I think that's my point. I am not an asexual person. 😂 i find asexual people very cold and i am not.

[VIVANT]

Asexual people are not one type of iersin I don’t see what being cold has to do with not wanting sex?

I know sex addicts who are very cold 🤷‍♀️

[COMMODOREII]

True in that sense. But i grew up in a culture where it is customary to hug and kiss the cheek. To touch each other to express our feelings. Like touching ones arm when the need help or if they are crying touching their back. Maybe not all asexual people are cold but the ones that i have met have treated me like a virus and wanted nothing to do with me as if being a friend was a burden.

[VIVANT]

I don’t think Asexuality is directly tied to touch phobia. It seems people like that would rather be in no relationship. How did you come to know they were Asexual?

[COMMODOREII]

They told me

[VIVANT]

Ah.. well I guess that’s know lol 😅

[COMMODOREII]

I hope you didn't think about me. If you ever really want to get to know more we really should chat more. 😉

[EmbraceThePain]

Lmfao the random pics of the cute dog.


I have never and would never be in an asexual relationship. One of the most important ways for humans to show affection, love, and care is to be physically intimate with one another.

[EmbraceThePain]

I want and NEED to touch, kiss, and have sex with my woman to show her how much I love and care for her. Relationships aren’t just about sex of course, but how torturous and cruel it would be to not be able to physically get intimate with your partner in someway. It would be awful.

[VIVANT]

Physical intimacy I agree.. I think it’s the epitome of intimate expression.

but physical intimacy is not limited to sex and ironically Often sex isn’t even intimate at all.

No one pretends to like someone for a hug. Lol

Often i see people say how they hate affection but enjoy sex. I would be miserable in such a relationship.. I’m not Asexual but I can Imagine being in a sexless one.. way Easier then an affection less one

and I have difficulty believing they are being intimate in sex when they can’t stand touching their partner with love

The actual sex part is brief. The intimacy is everything else.. I don’t know why people blow it out if proportion.

I can understand affectionate people seeing sex as intimate but I laugh when people who gate affection talk about sex being the most intimate firm of intimacy 🤷‍♀️😊 lol

[EmbraceThePain]

The thing is, when done right, sex IS the most potent form of intimacy. You can’t just jackhammer her for 4 mins and then call it a night... There’s ways to make it very romantic and slow to where doing or scaling other things like hugging, cuddling, etc. to the same level, still won’t get them to the same level of actual sex.

Are you in an asexual relationship of some sort?

[VIVANT]

Me? Oh no not at all. I was just curious.

And it hit me thinking how people unlike you -who are not even intimate, talk about sex as if it is intimate. I find it so weird.

I particularly hate the way physical intimacy is used as a euphemism for sex whether the sex is actually intimate or not. I don't know why it bugs me so much.. It’s just a lazy and annoying lol I don’t mean what you are saying I mean the piggy backers.

[EmbraceThePain]

People are dumb.

[Jamie05rhs]

@VIVANT I hate that as well. I hate all sexual euphemisms, come to think of it. "Sleeping with", "making love", "hooking up", etc, etc... Just say what you mean and mean what you say.

[Coloradomtnman2]

I literally dated a gorgeous model who hated to be touched. It was pretty odd and lame but she was fun so it did last for a couple years.

[VIVANT]

Hated to be touched AT ALL, or just sexually?

[VIVANT]

Out of curiosity... What did you guys do hat made it a relationship?

[Coloradomtnman2]

She didn’t like to be touched period. Hand holding was accepted in public. We did have sex occasionally. We also slept in the same bed, sat together and walked together.

[Coloradomtnman2]

Aside from that I did not really ever touch her 🤷‍♂️

[VIVANT]

So she was ok with sex sometimes but no touching.. I wonder why she was ok with sex 🤔

How did it end?

[Coloradomtnman2]

Sex was once a weeks sometimes more and that could be hands on normal sex.. what she really didn’t like was just regular and normal touch. She said it had always bothered her with everyone.

We both ended it after I bought my house. The commute was too much for her.

[Robertcw]

Not sure but I'd probably get along with asexual people better than regular people so I'd be willing to try it.

[VIVANT]

Yeah I kind of feel like they'd be more genuine. But I have no direct experience reason for saying so 🤷‍♀️😊 just a lot of surmising.

[ecfresh]

Can’t ever remember even meeting an asexual person much less dating one.

[VIVANT]

You probably were not trying to then lol 😊

[ecfresh]

Ha ha probably not

[Jamie05rhs]

Do you have to be asexual to be in an asexual relationship? Or are you just referring to a relationship that -- either temporarily or permanently -- doesn't include sex?

[VIVANT]

Hmm well

First. no I think you can be in an Asexual Relationship, without being Asexual yourself.

And from what I have heard. Asexual rejationship a can be whatever the people refuse they are. But I’ve never seen them involve actual sex.

A person who is Asexyal can ge in a sexual relationship

But if the relationship itself is Asexual. I think the intention is no sex.

I think not having sex for now, is probably “ waiting”

I think asexual means one or both don’t want, OR don’t intend, to have sex.

[Jamie05rhs]

@VIVANT So what you're saying is if it's considered an asexual relationship then neither one of them intends to have sex ever?

[VIVANT]

Not necessarily ever.. but In that relationship. but I’m sure there are exceptions. I don't know I’m no expert. If someone were to answer saying they were in a relationship they consider asexual and then they had sex, is have to accept that 🤷‍♀️😊

I just wanted to hear from People who were in their opinion were in an Asexual relationship with physical or no physical affection 😊

[Jamie05rhs]

"in that relationship.". That's what I meant. Lol

Nah; I the relationship is asexual, then the can't have sex. That would by definition make it NOT an asexual relationship. Because it is now a sexual relationship.

[Exorcist_Rampage]

Oh no! That dog is a Celtics fan.

I have never been in any asexual relationship. I don‘t have that type of willpower, nor think I ever can have it, madam VIVANT!

[VIVANT]

Hmm I don’t think I’d mind much myself.

[Nik1hil]

Sexual people should not waste their time caught up on relationships with Sexual people.

[Nik1hil]

"Sexual people should not waste their time caught up in* relationships with Asexual* people."

[VIVANT]

Well ideally I suppose.. Though it happens. Asexuals dare sexuals and vice versa. though I had in mind Asexual members answering,

[Anonymous]

Only with my cats.

There was affection and cuddling.

[VIVANT]

Lol 😇

[loveslongnails]

An asexual relationship? Like, with a girl I'm dating? What the fuck is that? LOL That's why I have friends !! :)

[JustforLaughs1]

Is Asexual where the person is alone?

[VIVANT]

No. Doesn’t have sex.

[JustforLaughs1]

Got ya. I wasn't sure. I've been in relationships that didn't lead to sex. I wouldn't call them Asexual relationships though. Hahaha!

[VIVANT]

Lol yeah not exactly 😂👍🏻😊

[Nikki1989]

I could never be in an asexual relationship.

[Samantha_17]

Sex is indispensable :)

[Pex1995]

I am asexual actually vivant