It's been 7 years & my boyfriend still hasn't proposed? What do y'all think? (Page 3)
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"he continues to act like I'm his wife, having me do everything wifey like for him but without the ring."
If a guy gets the benefits without having to sign up for the commitment, why would he? He has what he wants without all of the risks.
I think what is rational to think-- that marriage doesn't matter.
"Sure, he's great, were in love, happy, he gives me money & buys me stuff" ... okay, so...
"but I want a marriage commitment" ... why.
"Is that asking too much?" Yes.
That's what I read too. He was the sugar daddy and she's the maid that provides food and sex. No wonder he doesn't want to even mention the word marriage.
It doesn't even look like a real relationship.
I always say you need to have this discussion before you even get together. How do you know he dosent want to get married? You could both be wasting your time
Okay, after seven years, this is breaking news to you? You have had plenty of time to establish boundaries in your relationship, and you haven't... uh why the hell not?
Have you talk to him about it, maybe he doesn't want marriage. My dad was around 40 or 50 when he marriage my mom and she was around 30. So in short maybe he's just happy with what he has now, why marriage, it doesn't really do anything.
It's weird, but after 2.5 years I feel more comfortable with the thought of getting married to my crush than her being my girlfriend, because being in a relationship is like holding some fragile diamond in one hand while marriage is like holding it in two hands.
Is better like that hun sometimes we sleep with our enemy... when you get married and something happens to you with you any type of accident or health condition that puts you in to a coma your spouse have every rite to decide to disconnect you imagine having a spouse that ain't got no good intentions towards you
Hold up? Disappeared for 2 years? And you allowed him back?
Nah, that's not love. He ran to meet the next girl, things didn't work out and he wants to fall back on you. Plus he hasn't engaged or talked settling. Not a good sign.
You're not asking too much.
You need to stop acting like a wife until you are one - you know what I'm saying? He's not going to go through the complications of marriage when he already has a 'wife' for free.
Why do you need a marriage to settle down? If your relationship works as it is why change things and risk ruining it.
What's amazing is not that he hasn't proposed after 7 years. No, what's amazing is that apparently you two can't openly talk to each other about these things after 7 years. Just wow.
It feels like they’re using each other and they only want one another for shallow reasons.
@navyrobin Maybe, I don't know. Whatever it is, if their communication is that bad after 7 years, they're both not mature enough for a long term relationship, let alone for marriage.
How about you propose to him. It’s a win win. If he says yes you get married. If he says no than you’ll know he’s wasting your time, or he might say no but not yet then the seeds are planted and that could lead to marriage
I saw this movie already. It was titled the astronaut's wife. Time traveling astronaut boyfriend sounds like a high maintenance kind of guy. You might want too explore all your options before committing too this space cadet.
He's almost 50? He's probably set in his ways.
Not to sound crass or offensive, but to recycle the phrase... why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?
Many people on here have been scared away from marriage by the onerous legal landscape coupled with high divorce rates. They'd rather commit but not marry. Which is what your guy has done (apart from two oddly missing years).
That he is smart.
Marriage is a trap for you to get half his hard earned stuff. Asking him to marry you is too much to ask for in today's society with the current state of family law.
You say he gives you money, are you in a sugar daddy relationship? If so get a clue that there is a 0% chance he will ever marry you because he would rather buy a different *younger and more attractive* gold digger than commit to you.
If he was my sugar daddy I wouldn't even be posting this.
Maybe reconsider that ideal. He is giving you money for you to be around? So is he just that much of a SIMP that you are not even blowing him?
When I said he gives me cash, I just meant that he will help me if I ever need it. Not that he pays me for my time. DUH. If that was it, there would be no complaint of marriage here. I want his loyalty of commitment, not his low income.
Then why are you getting married or want to be? From today's men marriage is just a money contract that says you want half of his net worth.
Like it or not, that is how 95% of men view marriage and it is why you will never get an offer in your lifetime (sorry to burst your bubble). The history of the divorces over the past 30 years have painted this picture vividly to men and until the laws are drastically changed that in such a way that men are not ruined in divorces, marriage is dead.
Well hell maybe your right... Maybe not. At some point though someone still gotta believe in marriage for love, I know I can't be the only one.
You propose him then. That's simple. If he doesn't accept it, eh... Well, now you'd have an answer yeah?
Oh babe, thanks! I love the simplicity of this helpful thought.
No problem. Good luck.
There is no reason for him to propose. He's at an age where he just wants to have fun. Why would a 50 year-old be interested in forming a family for the first time?
Based on the info provided I don't understand why he would want to at this point in his life. You don't give off the vibe that you want to either based on your actions. Maybe have a conversation with him about it. That'll give you an answer.
It doesn't look like he's ever gonna do it.
Toss him out and get you a younger man and start a family with him before it becomes too hard to have a child.
Stop giving love, time and emotions to men who aren't willing to marry you/