Isn't it shocking how one bad person ruins a whole relationship, even your personality?

[Anonymous]

My current relationship of 9 months:

There hasn't been a single argument nor any yelling matches, my parents liked him and he even once said ''You don't get angry don't you''. Unless it's something serious or he starts yelling suddenly, I find no reason to get upset. I'm overally happy and feel peace. My real personality is a calm, relaxed woman that doesn't like drama.

My past relationship with a narcissist:

He created arguments on the 2nd month or so. Out of 100 arguments, 99 of them were escalated by him and the 1 argument was me fighting back against his horrible treatment. I would find myself confused and wonder what the hell went so wrong to justify a good day ruined, why did he said I don't cherish our love just because I don't make creative meals, why does he overreact easily to trivial things (ex: I missed his text message and call by 5 mins once because I fell asleep and he immediately sends me an angry ''I'm mad, don't call nor text me''), why did he yell at me suddenly, what's going on, I'm miserable; I'm sad, what on earth I did wrong now, etc. Suddenly I began arguing with my mother for no reason and taking it out on others.

Updates

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So yeah a calm, sweet, peaceful woman with a narcissist and short-tempered man is a totally bad combination. My 2nd boyfriend is like my equivalent; a calm, serious, family-oriented peaceful man.

[LazerBean]

No, that's pretty much how I would expect things to go.

[Asker]

True. Even my parents say they see a total difference in me. When I was with the narcissist, they saw that I suddenly changed into a bitter woman holding grudges suddenly, a woman that no longer spends time eating with them at the table and that I began with obsessive habits. They both said ''It felt like we lost our daughter, her old self''.
Now that I'm in a healthy relationship, they said everything got back to normal again and they have their daughter back, the old sweet, calm woman.

[FilmGuy93]

It really is amazing. One bad relationship can just freakin destroy people

[Asker]

Indeed. While my past narcissistic ex boyfriend nearly destroyed my relationship with my mother and brought misery, this current boyfriend made us bond stronger than before and brings peace.

[FilmGuy93]

One of my big things in dating is to talk with women’s friends/family (if possible) to get a vibe for how the relationship will go. Once I have the girlfriends’ blessings, I know things will generally go well. But I never presume anything going in. I have had some dates that I thought went super well, only to have the friends tear me a new one later. And I have to think that was for the best.