Wanting to cheat in long term relationship. What do you think about this scenario?

[Anonymous]

Long story short, my ex told me he is in a long term relationship. She lives in another state and they see each other once every couple of months.

He told me he misses. When I asked him why he wants to cheat he said:

"You live once. And it's not like she's around to know".

Needless to say, I said no.

However, I started to think: Does he not care/ love his current girlfriend? What is the point of his relationship?

Please comment. Thank you.

[Screenwriter]

Love the one you're with. I think men divorce sex from relationships very easily because they 1. do not have babies and cannot get pregnant 2. have external genitalia and most often are not penetrated.

They also tend to have much stronger sex drives, so they indulge them to, well, get their rocks off. Masturbation just doesn't do it. They need an object of desire, even if it's only for a moment.

[Asker]

The question is: does he love her if he wants to cheat on her?
I know plenty of men for whom cheating on their significant other would be unthinkable even if they weren't in love yet.

[Screenwriter]

I thought my answer answered you. I think people can love someone and divorce sex from love. It's just sex. It has nothing to do with love, and therefore means nothing. It's like fancy masturbation, but it involves another person, for a hot minute. Not someone you want to fall in love with, or shack up with, or even have sex with a second time. For the "rocks off" moment.

Just as people can be in love with more than one person, for some, cheating doesn't matter and they cannot see how it affects a love relationship since it's "only sex."

[SotiCoto]

It is like smoking, I guess. I mean you could spend your entire childhood being told "Don't do this thing as it will ruin your life" ... and even have practical examples shoved down your throat as to what will happen if you do it, and how you will never recover from the damage caused...

... but then people will just straight up do it anyway, as though they believe consequences are something that happens to other people.

[Gigerpimp]

I feel like he should just tell her and see if she be ok with it maybe they can have an open relationship its one thing to want to be together abut can't rather then laying by them every night

[LazerBean]

He's just not fit for a relationship, that's all. Plenty of people like that. Why or how doesn't really matter, only thing that matters is that you don't let those people's poor quality bleed over into your life.

[N271298]

A Long distance relationship must be hard. Everyone has physical needs too. Doesn’t justify his actions though. Instead of speaking with his partner about it he wanted to go behind her back. That’s a selfish move. No one deserves that. He should maybe break up with her or figure out a better way to do ldr.

[aceleon]

he is just horny and an idiot for having a long distance relationship.

[sawno]

Stay far away from that one, you don't want that on your contious.

[laly520]

a cheater n he doesn't love her as he should, cheating is a big no no, he gotta tell her he wants to do that or this not behind her back

[OtterMan68]

Cheating = dishonesty and lack of respect for your partner.

[chris1350]

if your willing to cheat then the relationship is over cause if you wanted to still be with that person why would u want to be with someone eles

[DARKCLOUD1945X]

He is just looking to keep a spare sex partner handy

[Roudyrebel8]

Yeah I think maybe there is trouble in paradise

[riverrat3]

People need to be touched, a bit difficult in a ldr

[jahaims]

You can't cheat if you care about the person