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I'm not saying maintaining a relationship is impossible, just what is the hardest part for you in maintaining one? Is it communication? Sexual incompatibility (one wants sex more than the other)? Something else?
I’d say the biggest thing is that there’s a part of me that just isn’t meant to be in restrictive situations. I don’t even mean that in terms of fidelity, I just mean in terms of sacrificing what I want to do in favor of what she wants to do, whatever that may be, and I may not even know what I want to do is until some random moment when it dawns on me, but now I’m booked up because of someone who isn’t me.
That sounds selfish, and I guess by definition it is, but it’s not a malevolent thing, I’m just wired to blow in and out of town with the breeze, at random. In another era, that rolling stone absentee dad who left for ten minutes to get a pack of Lucky Strikes and a bottle of gin and was never seen or heard from again.
That sounds bad, I’d never do that to a kid, lmao, but the rolling stone part…. that’s all me, despite also being a man of routine and a tendency to remain stagnant…but I reserve the right to be a rolling stone😂
https://www.tiktok.com/@moviedominion/video/7257623653502831899
“Go to India. No, seriously…. GO TO INDIA.”😂😂😂
But yeah, kind of like that…. a bunch of things I probably wouldn’t do but the idea of not being free to do so if the urge struck me bugs me out. Basically living with consideration for anyone other than myself is the ultimate sacrifice for me in both relationships and general society, lmao, and I just need that understood and appreciated😝
It’s really not as serious as I’m making it to be, I’m just goofing around. But it’s more just frustrations of “I want to do this, but she wants to do that, and as the man, I feel like I need to yield to that so she’s happy.” She’s so good about letting me do my own thing, I have no real complaints, I more just mean in any relationship. I’m an only child, I’m used to having my way and not having competing wants and needs to my own, so relationships and more so compromise are still things my persona is trying adapt to. Luckily my lady is into astrology nowadays and this is apparently all part of being a Pisces, lmfao, so she’s just accepted me as I am. Good enough😂
I think a lot of people are extremely one sided. They care about their needs being met but they don’t meet the needs of the other person. I think a lot of people have unrealistic fantasies and I think it catches up to them at some point. Because someone gets tired of it and realizes there’s other people out there.
I think the hardest thing for some people is learning when to walk away. Knowing when it’s over and when it’s not worth it. I’m talking men and women here… I think in some cases they know it’s over with. But they don’t wanna admit it to themselves. So they become miserable. A lot more miserable then if they were single or at least split up for a time and see if they eventually moved on
Finding your puzzle piece! By which I mean, finding that person who truly completes you. That one person whose strengths are your weaknesses, and for whom your strengths are their weaknesses. So together there is nothing you cannot accomplish! Once you have found that person, the rest of it is just the day-to-day maintenance of any relationship. Never taking each other for granted, and always trying to keep things fresh and exciting.
I hope this helps
Sincerely, Laura 🥰
In a good relationship everything (even challenges) lead to greater understanding and joy, so it’s difficult to pinpoint “the hardest part.”
Meanwhile, in a bad relationship (for example if your SO is emotionally unavailable), every nice moment is accompanied by a “thorn” or trial that seems difficult because you want the person to open up and be present in the relationship.
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The guy I talk to now, I would say the biggest problem is time. If he does not have time for me or I do not have time for him.
I’m an introvert. A lot of people don’t understand what that actually means. It’s very difficult to meet someone on their terms because i may need to recharge when they want to connect. Conversely, i may need to connect when they’re not available for their own reasons. I know that appears terribly selfish from the other side. When i do push myself to connect with people when i really need alone time, i know i’m not the best company. So people i care about may not always feel like they are as important to me as they really are.
It’s been downright devastating since covid. Between being on lockdown, being an introvert, being a grown man, being a stranger in a strange land, and moving frequently for work, it has been extremely difficult for me to connect with anyone meaningfully. On top of all of that, i’m trying to practice sobriety. Normally i could just go to a bar and connect with a bartender or other drinkers. Even if it’s superficial, it’s better than feeling like i’m lost at sea. Now i don’t even have that. I can honestly say that i was fortunate to have never really felt lonely until a few years ago. I thought i had. But this is some next level stuff! Ell oh ell!
Boy, i really went off the rails with that one. Ha!
For me it was physical health and the long distance, communication and being on the same page we were experts in. I always had a good feeling on how to build a stable foundation for our relationship, was always honest with her so she could build upon me and we were excellent communicators. She had all those same qualities so the stuff couples usually struggle with was smooth sailing. But being unable to bridge the distance makes any relationship hard, you try until you run out of possibilities and then it ends.
Getting into one is VERY difficult for me. I think I would be ok at maintaining a relationship with a good woman who was mostly sane.
So far, the trouble maintaining was down to many things, but I think a big part would be either the habitual cheating (one girlfriend), or the wandering eye (another girlfriend). I think in the second relationship, lying in general was an issue with her. The extreme jealousy and constant accusations that I was cheating with anything that moved (when I have never had ANY desire to cheat) was a problem. I didn't put up with it for very long.
I think it’s honest communication. Being completely open and honest is difficult especially while getting to know someone. It makes you vulnerable and exposes part of each other that might be difficult to accept.
I think the hardest thing in maintaining a relationship is keeping it fresh and interesting. If you have been together for awhile, you want to make it a positive lifestyle outside work and keep the person engaged so the love doesn't fizzle.
Sexual incompatibility. In my experience a woman who doesn’t receive sexual intercourse from her man will seek it elsewhere. I had an ex who once said that sex and love are synonymous… we had a huge Disagreement about that which led to our break up.
I don't think is hard to maintain a healthy relationship if both partners are in a healthy mental state and share similar values. The most challenging part to me sometimes can be communication as in the way I address certain issues.
in maintaining not much... but in starting relationship I need time to accept the differences between us :D
Just finding time for everything that we want to do. Between our hobbies, family, and friends, our days are always packed
Communication. Parenting. Hobbies. Money. In laws. Sex. Health. Careers. Patience. Any one of them is a killer. Even small cuts by all build up to hemorrhaging and death of relationships. You have to do it all ADEQUATELY just to keep it going
Time! The hardest thing in time, how much can the relationship lasts? Does it have an expiry date or it's eternal, well at least for me it's eternal but for others it wasn't like that...
@Ez-Bri-Z_v2 its mostly sexual incompatibility
It’s a little if everything for me personally tbh, I’m not easy to be with and I’ve noticed that.
Both of those that you mentioned are probably the two most important. And also just treating each other with respect.
Keeping a difficult, demanding, unhappy woman satisfied is a difficult demanding job, and not worth the trouble.
The easy way to keep your relationship fresh is to keep your mind off your own personal club 💯
u it was never a struggle
It'd be the constant communication.
I don't find enjoyable things to be hard.
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