When do you know it’s time to end a friendship?

[Anonymous]

For me, my guy friends are individuals I’ve known for years. They are married or in long term relationships now which is fine im not bitter or angry. But when I make an effort to make them laugh or talk about sports or whatever, they usually just read my message and not respond. I consider that rude, because if I had a girlfriend or wife I wouldn’t just cut off people or act like a hermit. The term friends should be used carefully in my opinion just like family or work colleagues. I understand people will say, “they don’t owe you anything”. Well, when I was busy with grad school, and they felt down or blue, I spent time for years trying to make them laugh or cheer them up. So yeah I don’t care if I don’t chat with them anymore. I wanted to know if anyone of you have dealt with the same thing?

[sage2021]

Ya know, ever since I can remember (many many years) I had friends since childhood. When they would get a boyfriend, they would want to spend all of their time with him, and I fell by the wayside. That's just how it was.
But now that we can shoot off a text to keep in touch shouldn't be a problem. And yes, your friends are being very very rude to you.
I hear you when you said that you did important things for them for many years, which is worth a lot to most people. It is for me.
Sounds like your friends have turned into my friends because they just gave me the bum's rush, and I finally decided that they weren't who I thought they were after all. And I stopped contacting them fir my own sake.
It's hurtful to be dissed by friends but people are so weird now a days and they are uncaring and rude.
I don't miss those women I had to let go of. One of them, she was always a show off. She married a guy with a rich family and would send me pictures in the mail of them on vacation while I was a working single mom and never even had a vacation. I finally woke up in my old age that all these decades of friendship were actually not a friendship. I was the person who she could show off to and try and make me jealous. Then I realized, she was that way in Junior High School too.
Anyway, do what is best for you. I wish you luck. You sound like a great friend to have and they blew it with you.

[Asker]

Honestly, it's fine. I'm in my 30s now. I have my own life. Pursuing my masters, have a job, I'm dating different girls atm to find the right gal. I've been going to sporting events and to the movies alone. I've gone to restaurants alone. I don't rely on them. I'm not bitter that they are in relationships now. I get it, I would consider my girlfriend or wife like my best friend as well. But I wouldn't cut off people. I think my guy friends and I just grew apart. I try to be assertive, funny, but also talk about real shit like the economy or politics... They don't care about that stuff or if they do chat about it, its brief and vague. The best we can do is reflect at our younger days and say, hey its cool they were there for us in high school or whatever but people change, people move, things change. Part of it is maybe on me as well, I like to joke around and say corny jokes or dad-type jokes which they probably don't find funny either. But I'd rather make corny jokes then just be silent all the time. Actually to be honest, one guy I know I went to his wedding last year. I congratulated him in person, he said omg broo I didn't think you would show and gave him money. There was no food at the wedding which even my mom was shocked to hear. I did it to be nice.

[Asker]

But when I was interested in a girl back in high school, I asked this same guy (guy who got married last year) who was friends with another guy to ask his sister regarding myself. He's like I'm not doing that for you man. I wouldn't do that if another guy approached me about a girl I knew. But yeah, some people just like to make others jealous, I completely agree with that. That's why even though I have these guys on social media like IG, I'm not going to fluff their ego by complimenting them. I was quite supportive but they just don't make any effort and Its time to move on. Another guy I know has been complaining since 2018, he always has this negative mindset, very hateful view towards women. I got tired of it and said dude, don't label all women that way, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, look for a new job, look for new meaning in life.

[sage2021]

It sounds like you could turn yourself into a pretzel 🥨 and they would still be the way they are.
One thing I know about joke telling. If it isn't Ha Ha funny then they get embarrassed for you, which in turn makes them feel uncomfortable. People normally dislike hearing a joke that's not funny. It forces them to have a Segway to change the subject.
Oh, by the way, when I was single, I would go out just like you are, and hoping to meet a guy. Turns out people pay more attention to a person when they are sitting with friends.
Anyway, it sounds like they are who they are now.
Time to hone those comedian skills and look to the future.
What is your degree going to be in? Just curious...

[jennifer_bloom]

My friends and I reflect each other, I babysit their kids because they are parents and they buy me sushi because it’s my favourite restaurant, I’m sure if I was not there, she would be eating at a different restaurant, and if she was not there, I would be at a movie theatre or library at not at a park with two young kids. You adapt to them and they adapt to you.

[Nikki1989]

When you run out of things to talk about.

[Anonymous]

When the unwanted penis pops out ready to go.

[Asker]

It always goes back to the penis *smh*, I should have hit my boys in the nuts when I had the chance. I'm kidding, *evil smirk* ... nah, whatever can't rely on others, even friends, people enter and leave life all the time.

[FifiJones]

When the coockoo bird sings

[FifiJones]

In your situation it's their wives making certain they don't go out and meet another girl. Wives love planning to keep the house and money when husband dies.
Why else do you think they live longer?

[Asker]

I don't think its that, even before they got married they didn't give as much effort to meet up. Im tired of reaching out to people who don't care. I'm not devastated, tbh, I'm a fairly talkative, friendly guy. When I play basketball at the ymca, I meet new guys there and talk about sports or sneakers. I've been going to the movies alone for close to a decade now. If i'm craving something to eat, I just go, I don't wait for others to make plans.