Should I accept the fact that I'm a failure?

[Leapfrog00]

I have come to a standstill of confusion. I've been writing since I was little. I've written many novels over the years, and last year, I started writing a book series, which I never did before. I write 3 books so far, and now I'm halfway done with book 4.

Here's where it gets tricky. I moved to a new town a few months ago because I was living with a narcissistic aunt who put poison in the cartons of juice in the fridge, and then she kept handing me bottles of pills, telling me to kill myself.

I lost all confidence. The town I live in now is full of drug dealers, crack cocaine, heroin, meth, you name it! and the drug addicts are everywhere and there are thieves everywhere here too. My aunt and her cousin took everything I owned and sold it. I literally have nothing but this laptop and a few clothes. Due to health problems, I'm having trouble holding onto work, especially because of the diabetes. I had a car, but the towed it after I moved here. I'm stuck.

I have no friends, no family. I get lonely sometimes. I feel like I belong here. I feel that I deserve this and that I am here because I am a loser. I wanted to publish one of my novels, my book series especially, but I get this feeling I'm going to fail, and see no point. I feel like I will be stuck here forever and will never do anything with my life. I'm too the point where I feel like just deleting all the books I wrote from my flash drive. I feel like a no talent loser. I feel like I've accomplished nothing. Should I give up? Thanks to anyone that responds.

[Rosexøxø]

NEVER!

YOU CAN AND YOU WILL DO THIS

AND I"M YELLING AT THOSE LIES YOU HOLD

BECAUSE YOU SAY WHAT ELSE CAN I HOLD?

you're GOOD ENOUGH AND STRONG ENOUGH TO HOLD GREAT AND AMAZING THINGS

I SWEAR TO YOU

YOUR ACCOUNT ON HERE IS ONE I LOVE I ONLY FOLLOW AMAZING PEOPLE SIR

YOU ARE SIR

YOU ARE MONSIEUR

KNOW YOUR TITLE

YOU ARE LEAP FROG SO YOU LEAP OVER ANY OLD BAG AND HAG AND POLLYWAG OR WHATEVER
AND YOU HITCH A RIDE ON A FLY SO BIG THAT YOU REACH A NEW POND

MY GOOD GOD DONT YOU QUIT OR YOU SEND ME THOSE BOOKS SO I CAN SELL IT FOR MYSELF AND TAKE YOUR MONEY TOO lol

None of this is joking a little bit for comedic relief, but it's all very serious and very true.

I'm typing now that I'm not reactive, and also to get everything out.

Listen, if you need a place to stay, consider jobs that offer free housing. It's for the able and you're able. You're capable. Sell that series because once you sell something- any product- that's instant revenue and every time anyone from anywhere in the globe purchases one, that's instant cha-ching for you.

I've seen how you've typed and YOU HAVE THE FUCKING SKILLS. YOU DO.

*pokes and presses in to your chest*

I WILL fight you lol if you don't sell those books...

And I'll tell you EXACTLY what it's gonna be like, so you don't have to worry.

You won't get the whole world.

Plain and simple- why? because none of us are 100% likable to ALL of humanity, BUT

you will be liked and your book will sell because no one can judge unhinged creativity, and you will always catch somebody.

Your writing style is like honey.. leapfrog, and you're gonna catch a bunch of flies.

we're talkin' cha-ching. Only filth you belong in, is filthy rich..

You will be leaping for joy.

When I read just the title of this question in the feed- I didn't know who it was, and I thought you had replied to someone else.

I would never expect it to be you BECAUSE IT'S NOT YOU.

It ain't you.

It will never be you, so stop playing the wrong role, take the lead, and suit up.

You can make this convincing with your creative talent, we all can believe you'd be a failure if you paint your words write, BUT NOT ME.

I see people, and I've seen you, and I'm not arguing this, end of the discussion, you're already a great person.

You're not supposed to quit in this story.

Don't fall in love. Don't romanticize the sad and doomed ending.

You're the writer.

YOU come up with the solution.

The greatest tool you have is your mind.

Again, when I read just the title I was gonna say a mere:

"nope, you can accept it after you're dead. Because that's when all IS FINAL."

Nothing is SET in STONE at this moment.

May as well some angel holding their hand out to you because

and I DO QUOTE THE TORTOISE FROM KUNG FU PANDA lol:

YESTERDAY IS [FUCKIN] HISTORY[!]

TOMORROW IS A MYSTERY

BUT TODAY IS A GIFT. THAT IS WHY IT IS CALLED [...]

THE
PRESENT.

Do it buddy. Fucking do it because I'm waiting for you to do it, and I know you can (have it in you to do it) and if you move (take the steps, big and/or small) you WILL DO IT

IF I COULD SUMMON NIKE NOW LORD CHEEZUS Lol

DO IT DO IT DO IT

I will not see you defeated.

Here are practical options for you (know your options):

• any government aid, you can apply for/ qualify for

jobs that offer free housing: ranches/ farms/ski lodges/

• listen you can get a cheap paid job, go online, there are people and sites of people who are looking for roommates- called group renting or whatever (break the fees and you're automatically in the green for affordability- heck you can even work retail)
• pick up some gigs, any you can, even while group renting can consider online jobs like customer service
• while you get these jobs for now to advance- save up/ edit the stories/ apply for Medicare (get proper medicine for diabetes)

I don't care what anyone says. There is a solution to every problem

and a solution to every math problem.

KNOW YOUR OPTIONS

There are resources always available to you because no one wants dead weight. Not even the USA, so if you want to work and be helpful, they WILL assist you.

I believe in you most importantly, so if I didn't I would not even waste time on this- I'd be silently cringing somewhere and hope someone else could help you, but I believe in you, and you're NOTHING

NOTHING

NOTHING!!! like your family.

You are better than them, and you need to go.

Watch the queen of Katwe- Sometimes the place you feel comfortable is not the place you belong (I forget the quote; I'll search it), but watch that, and rise, man! DO it. ANd update us when you do :] It'll make my day, and the day I read it, I will absolutely take a glass of water and slam it on the cement in your honor.

[Rosexøxø]

get out there, man! live your life, I will throw you! lol

If i literally could throw you into the success like a football, full send I would lmao

You're going to make it, if it's what you truly want. :]

[chicken_nugget24]

Omg such a lovely and positive response 💕

[Leapfrog00]

I appreciate the kind words. Thank you so much. I needed that push! My mind has been a little scrambled since all this happened.

You inspired me! You gave me some awesome scented positive vibes. When I first started writing my "Destination Fear" series, I didn't realize how much characters grow after you keep writing about them because well, I've never written a series before.

Sometimes I feel like those characters. They always had trouble facing their fears, then they die and are told they have to come back to earth to face them. They travel through time in the process, but there was this one chapter I wrote in the first book where the characters traveled back to 1965, and my character Lexi was about to get shot but Violet pushes her out of the way and gets shot. When she asked her why she took the bullet for her, she said, "Because I know you would have done the same for me."

You gave much such encouragement. and you took time out of your day to write me your thoughts and encouragements. This means the world to me! I'm sorry if I'm rambling. I kind of forgot how to talk to people.

You're right. I let all the negativity get inside my head. I don't know why I feel like such a failure. Thank you for everything! I needed that encouragement. You are such a sweet person! What's funny is only I would write a book about people facing their fears and myself failing to do so.

I kept getting this image in my head that it was all over, but you taught me there's hope. I've never accomplished anything in my life and I thought I was cursed for a while there, lol.

Would it sound creepy if I saved what you wrote and come back to it when I feel like a failure again? You made me realize that I don't have to let what has happened take anything else away from me. I control the story. You are the kindest person I've ever talked to.

[Leapfrog00]

You remind me of my character Lexi. You're probably warm and kindhearted just like her :)
I will try to remember every single piece of advice you gave me. I guess I felt no sense of accomplishment. That was so kind of you to take the time to respond. I hope I can stop feeling like this and exit those negative thoughts because you taught me to shoot for it. This meant a lot to me! Truly!

[Leapfrog00]

I watched the movie you recommended, "The Queen of Katwe." Omg, that was the most touching movie I've seen in a long time! She won so many trophies! I laughed forever when that little girl cried about her queen being taken! lol. Yeah, it doesn't take much to amuse me! She really moved up, accomplishing so much! This movie really inspired me! You really inspired me!

Thank you again for your kind words! You are an absolutely amazing person. I hope I'm not sounding too weird. My communication skills are not the best, lol. You made me realize something about myself that no one else ever had before. I was ready to throw something away that no one else has ever seen. My novels, my short stories, even some of my poetry. Thanks for everything! It meant so much to me!

[Rosexøxø]

no worries- I read everything you said and love your positivity!

I have to add that your replies were legible and conveyed nicely, with almost no surprise!

You're a fluent individual, sir!

I won't be on GaG much because I too have dreams I must work towards. You can believe my odds are tough but I too will not be giving up.

So let that be a reminder!

Either way, DM ME when your book gets published, as I'd like to be one of your first buyers :)

(please consider signing it for me- would truly appreciate it 10/10)!

[Rosexøxø]

I'm glad you loved the movie! recommend it to anyone you can! (and ofc, tysm for the mho and for taking the time to reply to my heartfelt comment :) )

[Leapfrog00]

YM :) I'd be happy to sign a copy when I publish it! I really believe I wrote an excellent book! The story idea is original, the characters are sharp and witty. I was almost going to give up on it. I have a good feeling about this series. That would be rally cool if I could become a famous writer. One can only dream!

I will surely let you know when I publish it! I just have to push myself because of anxiety ::exhales::
Thanks again for everything!

[Nikki1989]

Failures and rejections are an essential part of our life's journey. Because of these, we learn and grow. It is what you learn from it that counts.

[Mynameisbobby]

You're judging yourself as a loser based on your crazy aunt and where you live. That does not make you a loser! I was abused when I was little up until I was 13, I thought I deserved to be treated like that even after my uncle adopted me. It took a long time to realize that what happened to me was not my fault and even though the abuse still gives me nightmares I don't let it define me. I just finished my first year of college yes it's a struggle because even after counseling which I still have, it makes you feel and think differently than most people. Sounds like you have a lot of talent, I say send them in! You'll never know until you try!! Definitely don't them!! Give it your best shot!! Good luck 👍

[Mimi_758]

No you should definitely NOT

[chicken_nugget24]

Don't give up!