Guys, Is he flirting?

[Anonymous]

Hey, so I don't know if I'm right here but hear me out. My boss (just a bit older than I am, he's 40, I'm 32) and I get along really well. He trusts me with a lot of personal stuff, talks only to me about personal problems etc. He is married with 4 kids of which one (daughter, 20) works with me too. Now I wouldn't act on my feelings for him (which I think are mainly physical) because of that but I catch myself and him always seeking each other's company. Often by using work related stuff but it then turns personal again, him asking me lots of stuff about my life. When we sit next to each other he's always looking into my eyes and smiles and our legs end up touching. Not just briefly but actually "pressing" against each other, neither of us moves them even with lots of leg space available. A few weeks ago he was talking on the phone with a work related person and he stood next to me (I waited for my coffee to be ready) and while he listened to the person on the phone he stopped next to me and leaned towards me, his upper body almost touching mine. I brushed it off as just coincidence at that time cause I thought he was just concentrating on the phone call. Now.. yesterday we sat in his office (just us two) discussing a really annoying customer and we sat next to each other as always and suddenly he "spanked" my thigh as I said something relatively funny. It felt good, I definitely imagined there to be more but now I'm thinking... what could this mean? Is he actually interested in me / attracted to me? I don't want things to turn awkward by asking him, cause he's my boss and we get along so well in general. Just give me some insight of a guy's mind.

[MrWolf]

Depends really. Best is to make sure it's that or it may lead elsewhere.

I kind have the same thing with my secretary but flirting nahh. I kind acknowledge her as my equal in the office and so she does.

We joke, we share info about each other. As i vouch her so much trust into her job. I too ask her questions because it's important to know about my employes as much as i can.

Are they okey, do they have an issue i can help with because said issue may affect her or his work.

For me business is business and that's it.
And I wouldn't risk a sexual harassment on the job nor would i approve it.

I see my secretary as my best friend on work. Because this woman helps my business to grow and makes my life easier.

So as i see you are in the same position better to clarify then jump the gun to early.

And you have my respect as you are our pillars of stability on work.

[OlderAndWiser]

Yes, this sounds like his way of expressing interest in a VERY discreet way which would give him plausible deniability if this became a problem. You need to stop this now and you can do so by saying to him, "If you weren't married, I'd be interested in getting to know you better, but you have a wife and four children and I'm sure you are a loyal husband and father."

[Asker]

Thanks for your advice 🙂

[Avicenna]

He’d have sex with you if there were no consequences

[Asker]

Thanks, that's basically what I'd do with him too if, as you said, there weren't consequences.

[Avicenna]

It’s understandable

[spartan55]

First of all, you don't know that he doesn't share with others. Second, okay, so what if he is attracted to you? Then what? Maybe ask his wife what you should do...🙄

[Asker]

Good idea, thanks 😂

[Iron_Man]

Yes all men flirt