Have you ever used online dating?

Question

A few weeks ago, I ended my relationship of the past two years. I'm sorry that it did not work but she revealed herself to be a hard core alcoholic with no motivation to control her use of alcohol, so I am relieved that it is over. I had been trying to get her to move out of our home since April but she was in the hospital three times this year, and unemployed, and she did not have the money to move out sooner. I was too patient with her but it is now over. So I have returned to online dating. I have active profiles on POF and on Bumble. I know that many of the younger users are skeptical of online dating but I am not. I resumed online dating on Saturday, December 21. I already have one first meeting scheduled for this coming Saturday and I am exchanging messages with three other ladies; I expect to schedule a first meeting with one of them within the next 2-3 days.  Have you tried online dating before? Did you have success with finding someone for dating? Would you try it again?

PinkMichae · Accepted Answer

I met the man I'm with now on pof. Been together almost 5 years now. Being in a relationship with an alcoholics really tough. I'm sorry it didn't work out but glad you are moving on.😎

IAmRedThunder · Accepted Answer

Yes! That’s how I met my fiancé! I was crazy hesitant to use it at first. But my cousin made me an account and one random day I decided to hop on and saw I matched with my now fiancé.

BCRanger10 · Accepted Answer

Yes. I had a profile, but I closed it when my then-girlfriend-now-wife became "official".

slatyb · Accepted Answer

Met someone online and married her.

sejla · Answer

Scared s***less to do it but the idea of dating scares me generally. At my age is it the most effective way to meet people other than meetup groups and volunteering.

Actually I do a meetup and I've listened to both younger men and women talk about their positive and negative experiences. One young lady had mostly positive to say about it even if it was only one time only dates except the one guy who started to become a stalker like and had to tell him to stop and tell the security at her job to watch out for him.

The younger men had less good experiences. Not bad experiences just sort of so so like they'd get women talking to them and they'd get all the way up to setting a time to meet and the women would disappear. I don't know if their experiences differ in that they are Asian and sometimes Asian men have a harder time on apps I guess.

I haven't set up a profile on any sites but just be looking through a couple I was wondering if I would even show up on that many men's queue because of their age range preference and then there are the men who are younger and say they date up to 75 which is a bit scary. The funny thing is that I look younger than most women my age and would in some cases look younger than the women in their preferred age range. I don't worry much about age in dating but won't dip too far up or down I mean not at any cringy age difference.

Cynicaldreamer · Answer

Yes- which is exactly why I no longer use it. It is frustrating and annoying.
Back when I used them, I never got any hits or messages... contrary to what most men believe, no, not all women have luck on dating sites! I was one of them. Even when I actively messaged men- nada. I might get a generic, "thanks but no thanks" type of reply, or nothing at all.

Yeah, my self esteem is already bad; I don't need dating sites to make it any worse. I can get rejected just as easily in real life without having to go online and face the same nonsense.

That was in my 20s. Now fast forward to today with dating sites such as tinder, catfishes and fboys running amuck, people not being themselves just to get a date... ugh, no thanks.

SydneySentinel · Answer

I have used it and I had some dates on it but I'm not using it currently. I may again in the future but not just yet.

coachTanthony · Answer

Very Nice! How you liking Bumble? Very curious

Anonymous · Answer

Try OK Cupid. Cupid does something that POF refuses to do. Cupid allows you to cut to the chase. Like POF, Cupid let's you select categories of intent.

But Cupid will flat out offer you the category of wanting casual sex. And to even fine tune it more, you can check the box stating if you want monogamy or not. You can also let people know if you're in a current relationship or not. (Yes there are some cheaters, but most of the married or or people "seeing" someone, are poly)

I know you're not looking for that, but it will still benefit you. It will benefit you because it gives the hookup crowd a place to go. And you might even be shocked at how many people gravitate to that category.

With POS, err, POF, they force people to rise out of the gutter and pick a category that's doesn't suit them. POS probably thinks that they're doing people a service by not offering those naughty categories, but they aren't. They are just promoting the practice of being deceptive about your intentions.

Also, don't think for a minute that those gals on POS that say they're looking fo Mr. Right, aren't banging Mr. Right Now's.

My brother and cousins are on POS reaping the rewards from the Cougars looking for "Long-term."
Hey, more power to them.
But at least on Cupid, there's way less beating around the bush! 😂

Yes, intended. 😋

razelove · Answer

Get off puddle of fish! It's all bots and scammers, like seriously man, depending on your region you might wade through 1000 of them to reach 1 actual woman. Women love puddle of fish because they just see guys who are beat down and desperate as hell after an ocean of bots and scams.

Bumble is fantastic, I also hear good things about grindr, but don't feel like trying it out. OKCupid is a good one for getting to know and talk to people one on one, I've had more friendships than dates come from there, but they're rewarding.

Facebook launched a dating platform. I don't trust facebook, so no idea how that's working out, it has gotten me good women in the past though.

I'm of the mentality of never jump from a ship into the ocean, so back-up plans for job, back-up locations for housing, back-up women for relationships.

Peanut127 · Answer

This may become a question by itself by why are u talking to more than one lady at a time before even giving first Lady ur full attention?

I did Okcupid in my 20s bc it had questions u cud see how the guy would reply, not as great as it was in past but this g@g site gives u a glimpse into ppls personalities. Yet, this site doesn't make profile questions mandatory nor where people live. My Okcupid lead to my soul mate to a point it seems creepy lol I'm deaf, he's not but I'll repeat his idea before he types it to me. Not everyone believes in that sh*T till u witness it but still, give one lady ur full attention before picking others to 'try on' u sound like ur shopping and a lady deserves more respect than that

Kayla45 · Answer

I tried to years ago, but the emotional stress and turmoil from long distance relationships makes things more complicated then I'd like.

It's not a bad option, but I just feel safer if I meet the person directly, I'm super comfortable once I actually get to know someone personally. It helps me get an idea of the persons personality and general mannerisms!

When it comes to online dating there's a lot of things you have to be skeptical of, and even be careful of as well.

That's just my advice anyway!

silvermoon84 · Answer

I’ve had a few dates and initial meet ups through online dating but nothing serious came out of it. Most of the guys either wanted to fuck right away or wanted to settle down right away. I think a lot of them assumed that I was desperate to get married and have kids right away because of my age which isn’t the case. I want to build a relationship and fall in love first.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

@OlderAndWiser I'm glad that you were finally able to break up with her. That is refreshing news. I bet you feel a lot better now. Good luck in your online dating quest. I think it's a positive thing, and I have faith that you will find someone great!

Pedrodad · Answer

I had one coffee date and we just didn't seem to connect I was chatting with another lady online and she was interested in dating me if I made a few changes which turned me off of her... I am going to try again with a lady I have been chatting with,,, I will keep you posted.. I met one on pof and the other two on Facebook dating...

Lunasss · Answer

I think online dating is awful. I end up meeting very lost people with low self steem, lacking in real intimacy, pretending to be narcissistic. Some people use it to get over a breakup or to fulfill their sexual fantasies. Some women are giving it the “last try” as they can’t seem to find a partner in real life. Cheaters and on and on.

mudie0991 · Answer

I said never, but the guy I like (and, tbh, should probably get over) I saw online, but not through a dating app. I'd never use one, though... I kind of find it to be used by people who are either desperate or just want a quick hookup 🤷‍♀️

RichiChan · Answer

I'm apocalyptically shit with women in the first place - but my experiences with online dating have honestly been pretty dehumanizing. Every time I match with someone it's like I've got to strut my stuff like a peacock to "differentiate myself" from the hordes of other dudes out there and I feel this really robs the whole interaction of it's novelty.

I know there are plenty of guys out there who enjoy success in the scene, and power to them - but it's just not for me.

Anonymous · Answer

I have and it was horrible.
None of the guys I contacted returned my messages even though I put a lot of effort in them. I guess I wasn't pretty enough for them.
They guys who messaged me had nothing in common with me and I felt like they were just messaging every woman out there.
I got back to a few guys but they didn't return my messages after that.
I got zero conversations, zero dates, just one big nothing.
I won't try it ever again.

Unit1 · Answer

I used Hot or not (I despise Tinder). Then I found out, that 99% of the women, who matched with me there ghost me. I really wonder what they are doing on dating apps in the first place.

The most common reason I get ghosted is shortly after they find out, that I do not have social media. Or they think I'm fake.
All that's left in my disposal is the reality outside. And paying prostitutes of course 😍😍

I'm not that active on online dating anymore. I like the idea but it's not a viable option for me over here.

Texaskid1 · Answer

I was on one very popular dating site for full year. I communicated with multiple women over that time. What did I get out of it? exactly 1 phone number and zero dates.

It was a huge waste of time and money for me.

I have stopped dating altogether.

DiegoO · Answer

I understand you can date more people with online dating but for me, and according to what I experienced from online romantic relationships, there is nothing better and more special than old school dating. That face to face contact and the click you feel in person is far more emotionally fulfilling.

Anonymous · Answer

i've tried it before but it didn't really work and in my area , there just wasn't enough matches or profiles to make it worth the effort , and way more guys in my area that were online than women , so it just didn't work out. if you were in a major city it would be a lot more useful , many singles available and you could afford to be more picky as to which ones to reply back and such

ThisAndThat · Answer

I've messed around with it just to get a feel of how things were though it was without serious intent and as long as I remain in the west for certain I'm remaining MGTOW Monk and possibly remaining Monk permanently regardless where I go in this world. As of this coming year, I'll be celebrating my 34th year as a solid MGTOW Monk.

glutendan · Answer

Ya, it doesn't require a lot of effort but there's just too many low quality girls. Say 50% are attractive, 20% are looking for a relationship, and 30% of those aren't sluts/addicts/poly/radical feminists/etc, you end up with a very generous 0.5×0.2×0.3= 3% potential options assuming no overlaps (although there likely is).

Add on the girl also being willing to date you and the odds drastically shoot down. To even get a third of that 3% you probably have to be a 1/50 top guy. Assuming you're average looking you might only match with one desirable girl every thousand swipes (which I find yo be pretty much the case).

Obviously you will have it somewhat easier if you're just looking for sex or dont mind fat girls or crazies.

But in general the quality is pretty low online and the decent ones get to be insanely picky. An average girl can easily expect top 5% men to be interested.

sean1234 · Answer

What the heck! I can't believe the one I voted C got the lowest percentage. I only got messages from 2 ladies out of the several years I was on it. One got so angry that she replied just from what I said in my profile, all it was, was pretty much biblical quotes. The other was extremely not my type, zero attraction.

Liskitty · Answer

I prefer to meet people in reality. I had a dating profile at some point which ended in 100 or so messages after a short time. Online I just can't immediately see if someone is suitable for me or not, it's too much work.

aicarg · Answer

Nope, it's not for me. However I've set up an online dating profile for my dad on Silver Singles and Match. He's gone on two dates with two separate women, the first woman was someone he took a liking to, but it lasted only 3 months for him.

shimmeryns · Answer

I never used online dating and I am not going to use it in the future because I'm happily taken.

HappyWife33 · Answer

I used to do well with a handful of different sites and craigslist back before the personals was shut down.  For today I hear Bumble is one of the best.

Gatman34 · Answer

Never and never will any man that used online dating is a desperate fool the gender ratio is 9to1 the odds for men are so bad the stats prove you have to be so pathetic and desperate as a man. You are just giving women free attention and validation and that is the last thing modern women need more. Men who go on dating apps have no self respect. Men need to starve these women of attention men need to have abundance mindset only then will things change for better for men

LyricalMoon · Answer

I never used it, by the time internet dating was a big thing I was already with my wife. Now if things turned sour, and we went our separate ways, I might actually think about online dating as an option.

DiamondQueenOfAce · Answer

Yes I have, and I found my boyfriend on there (5 years together). But if I would be single again, I wouldn’t go for online dating again. Too many perverts are on there - more than back then.

SuperManiac · Answer

I've not tried online dating and never really had an interest, although I like the idea better as we grow older since I think more people might be serious. In my case, I often lived in very dense urban areas, so there's like a horde of women right outside, and I prefer to meet them in person first if I could before shifting gears to the dating side of things.

Anon_loser · Answer

I have used it (unintentionally, long story) and I’ve met someone that’s perfect for me and I’m happy

falamercy · Answer

Relationship with guys I met in person hasn’t been working out and I’ve decided to try online dating and hopefully I hook up with a good lover

tartaarsaus · Answer

I have never used online dating, but my friends try to convince me to use it. I generally can’t be bothered as I’m not actively looking for a relationship

Gedaria · Answer

Its quite good at meeting people , but a lot are just wanting sex. I have met some lasses who are just lonely and just want to chat , these I can get on with, but they are friends. Exactly what im after not so much the sex...

cth96190 · Answer

When I tried dating sites, I found that if the female looked better than a wildebeest the profile was a fake that had been created by scammers in Ghana or Nigeria.
The profiles that were genuine and belonged to women who were within a day’s journey of my cave, were of women who were morbidly obese and insane.
Add to that about 200 messages per week from scammers in Ghana and Nigeria, who demonstrated an IQ of about 70 and thought that I was on a similar level of retardation.

TacosRAwesome · Answer

I've used online dating twice. Once when I got with my ex about 4 years ago and then 2 years later when I got with my current about a year ago. In all honesty, I don't have a lot of opportunities to meet potential partners in real life so online dating works.

DeviloftheValleys · Answer

Am in an open relationship, not using Tinder simply because my phone is currently being repaired. I enjoy Tinder a ton.

Likes2drive · Answer

I still use and once in awhile I get a message but very few meetings, only ones that are ok with least amount of fakes, like OkCupid and bumble

burlen · Answer

Yes! "I have used online dating in the past and had some dates or initial meetings as a result; not currently using it" because I'm taking a break on online dating. I've had three relationships off online dating and I've been on 30+ dates.

Nikki1989 · Answer

I have never had any need for online dating.

douride2 · Answer

I have never used it & don't plan on it in the future.

SamirahD22 · Answer

No. I prefer in person. off the bat you see what you like or dont like. i feel like you build yourself up online to what you imagine a person to be then once you meet them it's not anything you imagined.

Avicenna · Answer

It's no problem getting a date, but finding what I'm actually looking for? No way. I'd have better luck talking to random women while Im on vacation in Europe or Asia.

Twalli · Answer

I used it had no initial meetings. Stopped using it once I got a girlfriend

Redstang88 · Answer

It’s alright if you don’t get too worked up over the results (or lack of)
Bumble turned up absolutely nothing, gave up on it. Been on and off Tinder, met up with a few girls but nothing went far. Met the girl I’m with now on POF.

ChloeStarlight · Answer

I’ve never used online dating and I never will. If anything I’ll use my hobby of cubing to find a boyfriend once I’m fully recovered from surgery and can actually compete in a competition

CarpetDenim · Answer

I have dated online, but I’ve never used online dating or deliberately sought out a relationship online.

Izumiblu · Answer

Never done it. I personally don’t see anything wrong with it and have encouraged a friend or two to try it Just not for me.

Slim57 · Answer

Yeah, met 2 girls, went out with one for about 6 months, overall bad experience and waste of time.

Kinogo · Answer

too hard for me to bother

Desconhecida · Answer

Did you love her?

Fromdusktilldawn · Answer

Online dating only made me hate girls and give up hope

Shark_61695 · Answer

I've used online dating for many years and I average around 1 meeting every 3 or 4 years...

WhatTheHellAmy2 · Answer

Option E.  It has fun while it lasted lol

WhiteShoulder · Answer

I tried it back in law school

peytxn18 · Answer

I met my boyfriend and baby daddy on tinder!❣️ We probably would have never even knew eachother existed if it wasn't for tinder, and I'm grateful everyday I gave it a try ❣️

Anonymous · Answer

I met my boyfriend on tinder. We’ve been together over 7 months now and we are quite happy.

Liam_Hayden · Answer

I did a few years ago but too many flakes and transformers.

Anna0125 · Answer

Yes bad idea the person I went go meet turns out she married I ghosted her after the date.

Agem123 · Answer

I have used it. That's how I met my first boyfriend. Now I usually use it to meet foreign guys.

Have you ever used online dating?

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