Do you genuinely feel good when your friends are doing well and making progress?

[Anonymous]

Today I had an "ouch" moment with a friend who always is saying how much she "cares" for me, and appreciates our friendship. She's very emotional and expressive with people in general, so I've always believed this is true. Usually, when we talk I cherish her accomplishments and feel joyful for her as well. Yet today it was kind of weird that, I shared a positive note that I received. She changed her face and mentioned ohh yeah I knew about it. And the whole tone changed, it felt so weird and I felt like she wasn't happy for me wich I "brushed" at the moment and only observed and move on. Yet now as I reflect left me think that maybe she only feels "good" when its about her accomplishments or if the positive news are in her light. I know this might sound off, but really it felt just weird.

I do have other firends with whom when I share good news, I can feel in my heart that they're also happy for me. Now I wonder if this is rare or is common. In my heart I celebrate when people are doing well, that also makes me happy so it just doesn't makes sense to feel bad for others.

Do you genuinely feel good when your friends are doing well and making progress?

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

Very much in my case! For example, just recently one of my close friends FINALLY got married in her early 50s just a few weeks ago. She's been looking for a husband since I've known her which is over 15 years ago. My wife and I even tried to set her up with men in the past but it never seemed to work out for her.

Part of it is also selfish. I get upset when my friends are down in the dumps. So seeing them doing well is like seeing myself do well if that makes any sense. I have hyper-active mirror neurons or seem to be what some people informally call "empath". In particularly I'm very sensitive to people feeling lonely or sad (like I can suddenly stop having fun at a party if I spot even one person in the corner of my eye who looks lonely or sad, even a complete stranger), so seeing my friends no longer lonely or sad genuinely cheers me up. It allows me to resume having a good time and stop worrying about them.

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

I'm a bit less inclined if someone already happy becomes even happier as when someone who is sad becomes happy. I don't seem to be as sensitive towards happiness as sadness; seeing sad people changes my whole body language and I start to worry about them a lot. I still like that a happy person is even happier but it's not quite as strong of a response to me as when a sad person becomes happy, or a lonely person finds love.

[teamvic]

To answer your question, no I don't. But it's not me hating or anything I just don't have much emotion. But for your little situation, it couldn't definitely be the case. Where she only likes it if she's the one accomplishing stuff. People like to be praised but don't always like to do the praising. I say bring up something you did again and see hoe she reacts. If it's the same then she probably only into seeing herself succeed

[SecretsofKB]

Yes! I love seeing people succeed, and it's even better when it is a friend that you care about. I want people happy and it's great when they better themselves!

[Anonymous]

no. i really don't care about their lives or their progress because one of them has shown they don't care about mine. i have my own life to worry about.

[laly520]

yes
seeing friends make progress do feel nice

[BarryLiverstone]

Yes.

[RedInnocent68]

Usually.